Yassandra

Summary

Yassandra (also referred to as Yassandro or Yesandro) is a former swine herder who encountered the party in New Smoke's food court during Session 9. Initially encountered while promoting his pig business—which he described as distinguishing between work pigs, pet pigs, and food pigs, and conducting swine tastings featuring "the finest savia"—Yassandra became nervous when discussing his profession, admitting "I get really worked up when I have to promote" and revealing he had put significant money into the business. After the party compared a mayor to a "people herder," Yassandra experienced an existential crisis about his career, lamenting that herding is "such a flooded kind of industry."

Cat inspired Yassandra to abandon swine herding and become a hero by giving him a checkered tablecloth as a cape. He enthusiastically embraced this new identity, declaring himself "Yassandra the Hero" and expressing hope that people would remember this name instead of "Yassandra Swineherd." Despite his newfound heroic aspirations, Yassandra firmly refused to accompany the party to the Foundry, citing his vulnerability to being stabbed despite his immortality. Voiced by Shawn as the GM.

Appearance

Yassandra appears physically as a 22-year-old despite having lived for 65 years. In Session 9, he adopted a hero's costume consisting of a checkered tablecloth tied around his neck as a cape.

History

Session 9

Yassandra initially approached the party in the New Smoke food court to promote his swine business, identifying himself as a "swine herd" and clarifying he was not a "pig person" (pig-human hybrid) but rather a professional swine herder. He described himself as "a sommelier" who loves "a good swine" and invited the party to attend a swine tasting in a few days. When discussing his business, he became visibly nervous and admitted he had invested heavily in it.

After the party discussed mayors and herding metaphorically, Yassandra pulled up a plastic chair and sat down, having "never thought about it like that." He questioned whether his job was "kind of pointless" and reflected that he had "always dreamt of the open road. Just me, blue sky above me. No pegs to worry about now." When Cat offered him the checkered tablecloth as a cape, he stood up, threw it over his shoulders, tied it around his neck, and transformed into "Yassandra the Hero." He shook Cat's hand and declared: "Thank you so much. No one was going to hear of Yassandra Swineherd, but people might one day remember the name of Yassandra the hero. See you later, kids." He then "storms off through the" food court, planning to start small to make a name for himself and intending to take one of his pigs as a sidekick.

Later in the session, when the party sought his help, Yassandra revealed crucial information about his nature and circumstances. He clarified his age: "temporally I'm 65, but biologically I'm like 22" because "my family's immortal." He explained that while he won't die of old age, "someone stabs me, I'll die for sure." He also addressed confusion about his profession, stating: "I'm not a. I'm a swineherd. Was a swineherd. Former swineherd. Don't kill pigs like a butcher does that." He admitted that as a swineherd, he had "accidentally killed" pigs, noting "when you're a swineherd, it's just part of the job" because "sometimes the pig steps wrong."

When pressed about his house, Yassandra initially resisted ("I'm not giving you where my house is") but eventually relented after extracting a promise that the party would leave him alone. He pointed to a location "like 12ft away" from where they had been dining—a large shed-sized dwelling with a ramshackle wooden door, metal latch, padlock, and no windows. Inside, the shed contained a half-barrel chamber pot (a metal oil drum sawed in half) filled with a 6-inch layer of waste. Despite being immune to disease due to his immortality, Yassandra had "gotten used to the smell" of his unsanitary living conditions. The shed also housed several valuable items including the Ever-Living Branch, two Stoppered Glass Bottles containing liquids (one copper-colored, one bright turquoise), blankets, bowls, and spoons. The party used Yassandra's shed as a staging point for their reconnaissance of the Foundry.

Throughout these interactions, Yassandra maintained his refusal to accompany the party on their dangerous mission, firmly stating "Nope" when asked and making clear his fear of being stabbed to death.

Key Attributes

Immortality: Immune to aging and disease but can be killed by violence (such as being stabbed)
Age: 65 years old temporally, 22 years old biologically
Former Profession: Swine herder specializing in distinguishing between work pigs, pet pigs, and food pigs; conducted swine tastings
Current Identity: Self-proclaimed hero who abandoned swine herding
Residence: Shed-sized house in New Smoke, approximately 12 feet from the food court, containing basic furnishings and valuable items
Possessions: Ever-Living Branch, two Stoppered Glass Bottles with colored liquids, blankets, bowls, spoons
Personality Traits: Becomes nervous when promoting his business, had invested heavily in his pig enterprise, dreams of "the open road," willing to take risks as a hero but unwilling to join the party's foundry mission
Speech Patterns: Self-conscious about his profession, admits "I've said too much" when revealing too much information